Growing Old Disgracefully.

Growing Old Disgracefully!

I have been pretty negative about the process of aging recently, as you can see here and how I am starting to feel (not to mention look) old. I have decided that there must be some positives to being older, and here are a few things that I have noticed….

You can say what you ‘bloody well like’, in the words of my 85-year-old mother! Yes, once you reach a ripe old age you have earned the right to say what you like about anything; regardless of whether or not it causes offence or hurts anyone’s feelings. I have been in the supermarket with Mum when she has told the assistant on the deli counter that she ‘doesn’t want that plastic ham’ or she’s ‘not paying that much for a bit of cheese’ etc. They can’t decide whether or not she is joking but soon get the message when she turns on her heel and just stomps (well hobbles nowadays unfortunately) off! I. or my sisters (whoever has the pleasure of being with her)  are left cringing in her wake, rolling our eyes at the bewildered assistant.

She likes to say what she thinks about members of the family too. Either directly, once she told me that a trouser suit I had bought would look better on my sister as ‘she has got the figure for it’. Very true, but I was gutted, and never wore it again! Or indirectly, as in when someone has left the room and before they are even out of earshot she will remark about how much weight they have ‘piled on’ or how awful their outfit is!

Another advantage is selective hearing. This can come in very handy when you don’t want to do something. For example, my Mum hates putting her heating on, and would rather sit there shivering under a blanket than be nice and cosy in a warm room. So when any of us walk in to her little icebox, the conversation goes something like this.

“Why haven’t you got your heating on?”

“What?”

” I SAID, WHY HAVEN’T YOU GOT YOUR HEATING ON?”

“I cant’ hear a bloody word you are saying!”

Leaning over and bellowing in her ear,

“WHY IS THE HEATING NOT ON?!”

” Can you put my hearing aid in, it’s over there?”

By now, I have lost the will to go on, but will dutifully get the hearing aid which is whistling and shrieking, and put it in for her, and then just go and turn the heating on myself. It’s easier.

However, if I had whispered to my sister a bit of gossip about someone, she would have heard that and put her two penn’orth in!

When you are older, and supposedly wiser, you are an asset to any quiz team! There are always questions about the old days. Games like Trivial Pursuit and other question based games normally require a good range of general knowledge, and of historical events.It stands to reason that n older person on the team is a bonus (providing they have their hearing aids in, of course)!

You can dress with abandon, wearing whatever you like in whatever colour combinations you choose when you are older. Who cares about being colour co-ordinated any more. Many elderly people I have encountered (which amounts to quite a few), are very  uninhibited in their dress sense. Why shouldn’t you wear reds, green and blues ALL at the same time! Who gives a toss about what others think?!!

You can nod off at the drop of a hat. Think Grandpa Simpson here, and his amazing ability to fall asleep, even mid-sentence! Yes, when you are older,nobody thinks it odd if you fall asleep at inappropriate times. How great is that? If you have a social function that you are obligated to go to but are not keen, it doesn’t matter! You can just have a snooze whenever you want and no-one will think you are rude. Far from it, they will probably think you are very sweet and endearing!

Those are just a few of the benefits I have come up with to being older…. are there any I have missed?

16 comments

  1. Your Mum reminds me of Catherine Tate’s ‘Gran’ character – which in turn reminds me of my Mum before she succumbed to dementia. Actually my Mum always did have a habit of saying what she thought without filter. When I was about 16 and suffering from acne, plastering on the make-up and concealer before going out to a party, my Mum was getting impatient and said “Come along! Who’s going to look at you anyway!”.
    Hmm – can you tell – I’ve never quite forgiven her for that gem!!!!
    I’m coming up to 65 soon and now that little phrase is a comfort – I’m not quite so bothered about appearance, and long as I’m happy with what I look like that’s fine with me – I like being slightly invisible these days.
    I’m really enjoying my 60s! 😀

    1. It comes across that you are happy with who you are and it is wonderful that you have got such a positive and cheery demeanor as it is very infectious!! 🙂

  2. Lawd.
    I dunno, like I love me some older people, they’re so wise and candid, and they usually have that authenticity I long for in people, but some of it is enough to drive me to madness. My MIL is losing her manners, my mother’s losing her memory — well she never has had a good one, and my FIL has become this sorta combative jerk who needs more attendees for his misery group. They all still dress well, there is that, I suppose.
    Oh my, did I just vent? LOL Thank you!

    1. HAHA! I love older people too, and have chosen to work with them, but sometimes they do get a bit cranky and rude, although sometimes i love the stuff they come out with. They have lost their filter and don’t give a toss!

Comments are closed.